Tuesday, 9 November 2010

The 70 week

Not one for ranting (huhum) I just had to get this off my chest. I think I've already mentioned that my boyfriend works stupid hours at his work and this week is no exception. He's just rang me to say he'll be home at 10pm. He got up at 6am today and that was at a hotel, just next to his where his most recent project is happening. So, another 16 hour day. I last saw him yesterday at 6am.

This is the only thing we fight about. I moan all the time that he regularly does 12 hour days (on good days) and 16 on bad ones. He'll eat in his car as he goes to his next rdv. He always works on Friday afternoons even though he shouldn't. 35 hours my cul.

Can anyone give me coping mechanisms for stupid workaholic other halves? He says he has no choice, that the work has to be done etc etc but I worry about his health, our relationship, everything.

Tomorrow, straight from work, (ha) we're getting in the car to go to Wales for the long weekend so I can see my parents and somehow, miraculously he can be home at 7pm. how is this possible? Why can't he do this every night considering he should finish EVERY day at 6pm?! I hope he holds up on the long drive of 7 hours. At least when he's in the UK he'll be 'off duty', at least until Monday, when I'll start stressing about it all again.

7 comments:

Ksam said...

I don't have any suggestions, but I feel your pain - my ex used to work (and still works) a minimum of 12 hours per day. And since it's on a farm, he works Sat & Sun too (and holidays). It used to frustrate me to no end, especially since that meant I was home alone basically all the time. But maybe things will get better if/when your guy changes jobs??

Andromeda said...

This is one of the reasons we got a kitten. Ben wants to keep working in Luxembourg banks, which can mean very long days what with the commute and their 40 hour work week. The job he had this summer had him up at 6 at home between 8 and 9, and I hadn't started school yet so it was fun to have a playmate during the long lonely days. Now that he's changed jobs he's back around 7 so we can enjoy the cat together. It's scarily close to what I imagine life with a kid would be like (in both the good and bad ways), so the cat was a good way to clam down the baby ideas for awhile. Maybe forever, lol.

Mil said...

Remi works quite a lot, too. But at least he's generally home by 8 at night. Do you think it's really workaholic or that he honestly has no choice? Does he have an assistant? Maybe you should ask him if this is how his job will always be or if it's a temporary thing. It's tough when you're an expat and your only reason for being in the country is often away. I hear you!

Amber said...

I'm right there with ya, Em. Jeremie and I just had this "discussion" last night, because yesterday he left at 5am, and last night he got home around 8 but proceeded to do paperwork and administrative things until 10pm. He was gone all weekend at a trade show in Paris (left on Friday morning around 6am, got back Sunday night around 10, and yes, started placing orders, answering emails ,etc). Monday he didn't work, but he was dead to the world with exhaustion.
I knew that his job would never be 35hrs a week because he's "cadre" so he's got something like 3 weeks of RTT, but damned if he'll ever take it! I know it's a good job with a great company, but sometimes I can't help but to feel like i'm left behind, especially now that i'm working less and carrying around this heavyweight! Just for once i'd like him to come home to an empty house, see what a mess it is, realize that he's all alone to clean it up and to do the shopping and laundry and make dinner, and see how he reacts. I doubt it would be all sunshine and smiles!!

Leah said...

My suggestion is...mojitos and lots of them. I kid...a bit. Like Ksam, I don't really have any suggestions, but I am totally there with ya. The chef works way more than the 39 hrs he's supposed to for the majority of the year and it's completely out of his control. Plus, he gets home super late. It drives me up the wall, but for now the only solution for me has been to complain and then just deal with it. I notice things are better when I'm out and not at home waiting, so maybe try to catch a drink with a friend, go to the movies, shopping, etc. Anyways, I really do get it and it is hard, so hang in there!

Astrid said...

No comfort to offer either unfortunately. I know the feeling on project basis but we have at least calm periods in between.

I have a friend who changed her job so a future could be planned with her husband (kids), and another who basically told her fiancé to choose his job or take to his engagement ring back. But both of them had also tolerated the late hours for quite a few years, knowing that it was part of building experience and a career allowing them to choose a better job later.

Only advice I can think of is to focus hard on your dreams and goals that you have together!

And have a great trip back home!!

Clare and Gary said...

My hubster works stupid hours (construction) Last month he worked 26 days off straight without a day off, in at 6.30am home at 8.30 - 10pm. I was away for most of it in Australia working, so I missed not seeing him, but when I'm home and that happens I just find other stuff to occupy me... blogging, baking, marmalade making, house projects etc... just need things rather than watching TV to pass the time...

PS thanks for stopping by, I'm following you now!

Share me!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...